Hearts Are Broken

The alcoholic is like a tornado roaring his way through the lives of others.  Hearts are broken.  Sweet relationships are dead.  Affections have been uprooted.  Selfish and inconsiderate habits have kept the home in turmoil.  We feel a man is unthinking when he says that sobriety is enough.  Big Book, p82

This was a difficult passage to hear when I was just starting my recovery.  I wanted to come up out of the storm cellar and say, "hey look honey, it's over" and get everyone so involved in the joy that I got sober and stop there.  I wasn't initially interested in cleaning up the damage the tornado (me) had caused either.  I expected everyone to trust me even though I had hurt them.  I expected them to treat me well and start me off on a clean slate just because I wasn't drinking.  I wanted a magic eraser to clear up the harm I had caused.  Only through working the steps, making amends to those I had wronged and becoming a living amends by not continuing the old behaviors has my life begun to change.

Thank You Higher Power.  Thank You for the program of Alcoholics Anonymous.  Thank You for the steps.  Thank You for not being to hard on me and making this new way of life possible.  Thank You.