Wednesday, February 22, 2012

Pause for a Moment

As we go through the day we pause, when agitated or doubtful, and ask for the right thought or action. We constantly remind ourselves we are no longer running the show, humbly saying to ourselves many times each day “Thy will be done.’’ We are then in much less danger of excitement, fear, anger, worry, self-pity, or foolish decisions. We become much more efficient. We do not tire so easily, for we are not burning up energy foolishly as we did when we were
trying to arrange life to suit ourselves. It works—it really does
.  Big Book, p87-88

Ah yes!  I can't count the number of times I wore myself out trying to arrange the lights, the actors and the scenery on the stage of life.  I wanted it my way and I would burn through energy to see it turned out exactly as I wanted it to.  I would track down the people I was dating and stalk them to make sure they weren't cheating.  I would work extra hours to 'impress' people.   I would try to be perfect in everything I did to gain 'acceptance'.  Oh the sweet sound of, "Thy will be done".  When it does take courage and the power to carry out His Will, I always try to remember how much energy I used to go through and how I used to hide my exhaustion and pretend not to care with alcohol.  It seems that carrying out His will is the softer, easier way.  What a mess I can make when I try to control everything!  I thank my Higher Power for this solution called the AA steps of recovery.

Thank you Higher Power. Thank you for showing me a solution that works.  Thank you for giving me the power, one day at a time, to stay sober, both in mind and body.  Thank you.  

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