Conditions

We thought "conditions" drove us to drink, and when we tried to correct these conditions and found that we couldn't we became alcoholics.  It never occurred to us that we needed to change ourselves to meet conditions, whatever they were.  Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, p47

I always felt like a victim.  I believed that everything that wasn't within my control was a punishment for some bad behavior and that I was relatively worthless as a human being.  I grew up in a household where 'achievements' were praised.  When I couldn't arrange and order things to my satisfaction, I felt like a complete failure.  Only after coming into the rooms did I discover that it was my character that needed changing and not the outer conditions.  One day at a time I get the answers, guidance and power to carry out whatever is mine to do.  The rest is beyond my control and now I see it as a gift and pleasure to watch life unfold before my eyes.  Things still happen and life is still in session, but I can face these things each day and act accordingly.

Thank you Higher Power.  Thank you for lifting me out of the victim mentality and into the growing mentality.  Thank you for removing the defects of character that you have and thank you for lifting the defects to come.  Thank you.